


Born in Bordeaux

by lalois



Series: Born in Bordeaux [1]
Category: Kanjani8 (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Alternative Lifestyles, Boys In Love, Chance Meetings, Falling In Love, France (Country), Long-Distance Relationship, M/M, POV First Person, Series, Sexual Tension, Slice of Life, Strangers to Lovers, Tokyo (City), Wine, Workplace
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-30
Updated: 2018-01-28
Packaged: 2018-12-09 01:28:34
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 17,306
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11658765
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lalois/pseuds/lalois
Summary: A summer story, a casual, fateful meeting, two worlds intertwining.Inspired by the worlds of French wines and Japanese sake.





	1. Bordeaux, France

**Author's Note:**

> Translated from Italian and not beta-ed; I'm no native English speaker so beware of the possible presence of various mistakes.

BORDEAUX, FRANCE  
  
Corridor D. Booth DE147.  
It's huge in here. I've been walking back and forth for hours already, between a work meeting and another.  
  
Every time I'm passing by his stall and I meet his gaze, I feel like a goofy teenager, or a cheeky whore... when not both.  
No, no, neither. I've never been any of those, but he's got some sexy aura, the guy. Indeed.  
  
We met, that is to say we bumped into each other, when entering a toilet here at the international wine salon in Bordeaux.  
I was in a hurry, I didn't pay any attention to where I was going, and neither did him.  
  
I apologized, speaking in French; as soon as I looked up, I found out I had bumped into a Japanese guy like I am, so I bowed profusely, telling him again I was sorry in the language we share.  
He excused himself with a smile that could mean everything and nothing at the same time.  
  
Half an hour later, while I'm on a rendez-vous with the French partner I buy Burgundy Wines from (1), I'm already and helplessly thinking back at that guy: quite tall, slightly long wavy hair, some hint of beard and a pair of captivating dark eyes. A mischievous, lenient smile when he looked sideways at me.  
  
Some more twenty minutes later, I'm once again passing by the booths which are showing off the best sake makers Japan's more and more proud of.  
He's still there while serving the visitors with a beautiful smile, beside a way shorter colleague of his, who's wearing his very same outfit with a traditional haori and a dark green apron, sharp black eyes and long dark hair tied up in a sort of bun on his nape.  
  
Then a gaze, between the tall handsome guy and me. Just one meaningful gaze.  
He's got large and slightly callous hands, running down my body with some surprisingly good perspicacity, given the fact he doesn't know a thing about me and nor do I, apart from his skills to provide me a quickie in a toilet.  
His mouth sure proves to be skilled.  
  
_"Mmh, I'm almost feeling drunk right now.._." he murmurs then, slightly unstable, going back to his feet to put his uniform back on.  
_"An international salon dedicated to wine and spirits is pretty suited for this kind of sensation_ ," I reply.  
  
He cracks up, throwing his head backwards. He's gorgeous.  
He kisses me briefly, says bye with a knowing wink.  
  
Then, my agenda is so full that for the rest of the day I cannot even manage to get a glimpse of him at his booth anymore.  
That very evening, after an exhausting day of work meetings, I drive to the address written in the visiting card that he casually let slip into my pocket, before.  
  
It's no relaxing nor short journey, the one leading me from the traffic of a congested Bordeaux towards the unknown village he's staying in, almost on the estuary of the Gironde (2). But I need him naked on a bed, this time.  
  
I had never been beyond the city of Bordeaux before today; not this far, at least.  
After bypassing vineyards, other vineyards, castles with pointed towers and blue roofs, lonely houses and then some thick Atlantic bush, I'm finally able to see him again: a tall guy wearing sunglasses, a T-shirt and shorts beside a car parked in the shade of a bell tower made up of sand-coloured stones.  
  
_"Hop on, c'mon_ ," he beckons to me, " _you ought to see something._ "  
Mmh. Everybody says so, but then...  
  
It's another half an hour ride, with him humming some melodies I don't recognize, while I lose myself in the dazzling light that I've learned only in these places becomes so special.  
It's almost ten in the evening, yet the sun is still way too bright (3).  
  
He leads me on the beach, where there's some little bunch of people all waiting for the extraordinary magic to take place: it's the sun bathing in the ocean, lazily, an endless pool becoming all golden and red.  
  
_"There’s nothing like this in Japan, right? In the country of the rising sun, it cannot sets straight into the ocean_ ," he tells me with a pout, cocking his head to one side. " _Well, I've never been on the western coast of Japan, so I actually don't know how the sunset might look like from there. But it's seriously breath-taking in here, isn't it_?" He stares at me, smiling.  
  
I walk closer and I simply kiss him.  
Maybe someone is even watching us, disgusted. I don't know, and right now I don't even care.  
  
When the sun melts in the salty water and the creek of tourists slowly disperses, we stay one beside the other for some little longer time, looking at the horizon, in a silence broken only by the roaring waves.  
It's freaking relaxing for my damn nerves.  
It's so weird, I'm feeling so at ease right here, right now.  
  
We have dinner eating some good fish in a nearby bistrot, then we go for a long walk on the deserted waterfront.  
It's night by now, but by the horizon it’s not completely dark yet. It's amazing.  
When he asks me about which kind of job I'm into, I tell him I have a distribution for French wines and even a shop in Shibuya, with a couple of associates.  
  
_"So you're a pretty important one, whoah_!" he giggles.  
" _I wouldn't say so_ ," I try to shield myself. " _Well, the day after tomorrow I'll be at a gala dinner in a original French castle, but it doesn't change a thing, anyway... if you don't sell the wines, you don't mark the difference, in the end."_  
"And that's the very same reason leading our breweries in here, yeah. We need an international market," he concludes, stirring.  
  
He turns towards me with some weird expression.  
" _Can you see anyone around?"_  
"Eh?"  
"Can you see anyone around?" he repeats.  
" _I wouldn't say so. Why?"_  
He shrugs, smirking.  
  
He lets his clothes fall slowly at his feet, he enters the water naked with a shiver and disappears swimming, coming up some farther away, shaking his head and wet bangs with a loud moan of pleasure.  
I barely see him, in the darkness.  
And then I mimic him, almost in trance, bewitched.  
  
We bathe naked in the Atlantic ocean. The water is definitely perfect for me, so cold and smooth on the skin.  
There's no one but us and the placid sound of the waves crashing on the far away shore, and his head plunging up and down the water, like a child.  
  
" _Aaaaaaah... awesome... So what you think of the temperature, mister...?"_  
"Nishikido. Nishikido Ryo," I finally tell him.  
_"What do you reckon, Nishikido-san?"_  
"Ryo is fine. Please. I get addressed as Nishikido at work, and that's enough for me."  
"Uhm, Ryo-kun..."  
  
I grab his hips in the water, I kiss him. He repeats my name, I kiss him again. My hands run down his sluggish skin and I feel him giggle, before putting his hands on me as well.  
" _If we get caught by the Gendarmerie (4) right now, we'll be in jail in no time_ ," I tell him.  
" _Uhm, probably... is that a problem?"_  
"Currently not. But I sure do have a request for you."  
"As you wish... Ryo."  
I grab his nape and pull him closer to me.  
  
" _Fuck me_ ," I whisper on his mouth, just inches from the surface of the water. His mouth is tasting of salty water and of him, so incredibly much of him.  
  
We have sex on the shore, more than once, the waves tickling us during that endless night.  
By dawn I've gotten back to my Hotel in Bordeaux, where I sleep a couple of hours before starting a new day at the salon. I'm used to this.  
  
Our eyes connect to each other's while passing by his booth, in a survival game taking place again today, and his gaze has become sweeter and possibly even more intriguing when meeting mine; but when I stumble on the umpteenth disapproving nasty look of his colleague, the one with the long black hair, I decide I'd better stop by for a thorough sake degustation, though I've never been that fond of the wine rice.  
  
I realize I still don't know his name, but then there's another colleague of his -hair dyed blond and happy-go-lucky smile- who's calling out aloud for him, even before I can utter a syllable:  
_"Tacchon, Tacchon, he's come for you!_ "  
  
Amazing dark eyes are swiftly and silently scolding the blond guy, then they land curiously on me, with a knowing smile, and I don't care about the name anymore.   
  
We meet again for lunch; we agreed on sex privation until tonight, for a more exciting game play. So we share a grilled beefsteak instead, meat coming from an authentic French charolaise cow whose price can compete with a wagyu one (5).  
It's nearly as big as a dinosaur, this beef; after a few morsels I'm already full.   
  
" _You can’t be done, can you_?" 'Tacchon' asks me, bewildered.  
" _It's delicious, but I basically never crave for food,_ " I reply, grimacing.  
" _Lucky you... As for me, I'm always hungry,_ " he confesses, making a face as well.  
  
" _Why don't you eat it? C'mon, it's a pity to leave it like this,_ " I insist, offering him my pretty untouched piece of meat.  
_"Can I really...?_ " He asks then, and his eyelashes start fluttering.  
Darn. I shouldn't even think this, but he's looking insanely cute. He's beautiful.  
  
The steak is gone in no time. As I'm staring at his round cheeks filled with food, there are three Japanese guys appearing right behind him, his colleagues: the short guy with long black hair, the even shorter blond dude and the third, the sturdy one that eagerly approaches my friend.  
_"Whaaaahh Tacchon, so you did choose the tremendous big steak, in the end?!"_  
  
‘Tacchon’'s back turns abruptly, quite surprised.  
_"Hey, what are the three of you doing here?!"_  
"Same as you, dude: we're gonna eat! Is the charolaise good? I wanted to try it, too..."  
  
"Maruchan, you MUST- ow sorry, I didn't introduce you," he says then, looking at me. " _Shibutani Subaru, Yasuda Shota and Maruyama Ryuhei, they work with me at the brewery. Nishikido-san is an importer for French wines in Tokyo."_  
"I see... Nishikido-san, then," the short guy with weasel eyes murmurs. He doesn't look pleased. I guess he doesn't like me that much.  
I bow and nod while the blond pixie pokes his friend: " _he's pretty cute indeed, Tacchon..."_  
"Sho-chan, can you give it a rest please?!"  
  
"I need to get going," I say then, standing up to wave bye to them all.  
" _No, wait, I'm coming with you. I need to get back to our booth as well, we're taking shifts."_  
His eyes throw daggers to the trio, then he joins me.  
  
" _I'm Ohkura, by the way. Ohkura Tadayoshi._ " he murmurs, trying hard to hide the slight embarrassment his keen friends made him fell into.  
_"Don't tell me you still had not introduced yourself?_!" the blond guy shouts out at him. " _Shame on you, Tacchon!"_  
"Sorry, they're screwup and gossipy all the time," he confesses, slightly annoyed. " _You know, Kansai people sometimes is like that..."_  
  
"I was born in Osaka," I reply grinning, and he's smiling, amazed.  
_"Really?!"_  
“Uh,” I do confirm him. " _My mother is a true Osaka woman, my father comes from Yokohama. They moved to Tokyo when I was still a little child, so I'm afraid I haven't kept much of the Kansai spirit."_  
  
"I'd rather say that's some good news, believe me," he adds with a pout that makes me laugh again.  
I leave him at his booth and we don't meet anymore until late evening, when he comes with me at the hotel I'm staying in the centre of Bordeaux.  
  
" _So, what did you friend say about this?_ " I ask him while driving. I find myself pretty curious for his answer.  
_"We booked two twin rooms and rented only one car for the four of us,_ " he explains. " _I snatched it yesterday so it's at their mercy today, and I guesss they'll be eager to splash around in the ocean until they'll be kicked out after the sunset."_  
  
"You didn't answer, though," I tell him, pretty amused.  
_"It doesn't happen that often, me acting like such an egoist_ ," he suddenly confesses, looking out of the window seat.  
I'm taken aback. We shouldn't even talk, after all. When we met, we didn't feel any need for words.  
  
Once in my room, he's back to being the very same guy I met yesterday: quiet, cheeky and impossibly attractive, while he pins me against the door to crush his hips languidly against mine.  
  
_"Fuck me_ ," he asks me with a smile, his hands on my boxer shorts. Our little key word.  
I reward him by stripping him off his sweaty clothes, sucking off his nipples, biting the skin until he cries.  
He's no less masochist than I am, but I had guessed it already.  
He's making me crazy and wild, leading me to the utmost pleasure through the way I like best.  
  
He asks me whether I can take the bother to drive him back to his place, however late in the night.  
I take my time caressing his naked body, telling him it wouldn't be a problem as I am an insomniac guy, but I'd definitely prefer him to spend the night with me, so that he could sleep and rest some little more.  
  
" _I can't stay. My sleep is rather nervous."_  
"No problem really. But I could actually ask you for some physical exercise right after you wake up as compensation, if you feel like taking up the risk..."  
His tired eyes shine, and he cracks up.  
" _Thanks,_ " he murmurs, kissing me on the mouth.  
  
The following day we separate ourselves once we get through the gates, before any ironic comment could creep up from his friends. They look like longtime friends, to tell the truth; they probably are.  
I stay far away from the Japanese booths anyway; at lunch time I'm forced to hide in the Italian cafe until he arrives, far from the gossipy guys.  
  
That very night, after the gala dinner in Pauillac (6), he's the one picking me up and stealing one kiss after another in the car, without waiting, while we're waiting for the green of the traffic light.  
" _You taste delicious_ ," he murmurs, quite fascinated, breathing on my lips.  
" _The wine at Chateau Batailley has been produced for more than 200 years already, of course it's delicious_ ," I reply, laughing.  
  
I guess I might be half drunken, the thing is that during the car ride I slip and run my hand between his thighs and I beg him to stop somewhere, immediately. Behind a vineyard, in the middle of nowhere, amidst these little villages.  
  
We're doing it there, in the car, so hungrily, so desperately; my luxurious gala outfit is now sweaty and crinkled, and I couldn't care less.  
Ohkura is crying from pleasure on my chest, and if there's one memory I'll definitely bring back with me in Japan, is the sensation of his mouth on my skin, of my fingers threaded in his wavy mane, of his crystal clear and melodic voice when the orgasm makes him oblige and pronounce my name.  
  
It's past two in the morning when he kisses me and waves me bye; his group will all need the car in a few hours, so he's on his way back to his place for more time spent driving, in order to sleep almost nothing, before it's once again time to be working at the booth.  
  
The following evening we go back to see the sun dye the ocean gold, then we leave for my place in Bordeaux. We kiss for long, pulling his hair, caressing my body, before we end up in bed together.  
  
It's our last night, the last time.  
I breathe in his scent until I fall asleep in his arms, sleeping like a log.  
  
I wake up to the smell of some hot Italian coffee he's brought me up until here from the cafeteria in the hotel hall, together with a croissant. A couple of lunch have been enough for him to get to learn everything about my tastes.  
_"Thank you for everything, Ryo,_ " he tells me with a sweet smile, though still a bit sleepy.  _"I'm really happy I got to know you_."  
  
We both agreed on never meeting anymore, once back in Japan.  
We're committed to our works, some pretty hard-demanding works and so different from each other's. There are hundreds and hundreds of kilometers between us, from the metropolis where I live to the sake brewery he's in, in the mountains.  
  
It's just sex, in the end.  
Awesome sex, but it would not work.  
It's been a nice dream. A wonderful dream, and I'm glad.  
  
" _Thanks to you. It's been a pleasure."_  
He smiles again.  
I see him off with one last kiss. When I drive him to the station, I don't wait for him to be rescued by his friends. I don't think I could make it, as of now.  
  
I go out of the parking lot and drive away as soon as I can.  
I let him go.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> NOTES:   
> 1\. Burgundy: a region in the centre of France. Just like Bordeaux on the western coast, it's a very famous region for both white and red wines. Here were born some of the most expensive wines in the whole world.  
> 2\. The Gironde is the “river” (navigable estuary) crossing Bordeaux, that ends up in a very long and broad estuary in the Atlantic Ocean. Right on its riverside we find the Chateaux (castles) producing famous Bordeaux (and mainly red) wines.   
> 3\. In France there's the same time zone of Italy, Germany and most of central Europe. Bordeaux (just like Spain) is located western of Greenwich (0 Meridian) so it's funny because while in central Europe in summer at 9 pm the sun sets, on the western coast of France the sun is still pretty high in the sky ^^''  
> For the very same reason, at 11 pm you can still get a glimpse of light blue over the horizon, it's strikingly beautiful!  
> 4\. Gendarmerie: French police.  
> 5\. Charolaise / Wagyu: valuable meat coming from cow / beef, the first one is French, while in the latter we can find the famous "Kobe beef"  
> 6\. Pauillac: small village hosting a few castles, producers of valuable wines.  
> Chateau Batailley mentioned right next is one of those.


	2. Tokyo, Japan

TOKYO, JAPAN  
  
It's been nearly a month.  
  
My work schedule at the shop and the visiting cards I brought back from Bordeaux for gaining new wine suppliers took me up to the point I haven't had that much time to let my mind space out; I would be a liar, though, if I were to tell myself I haven't thought about him every single night, ever since.  
  
Once or twice I did even consider seriously the option of ending up in the sake brewery where he works, around Mount Rokko; I checked the train timetables, the flights fares, how much it would take me to rent a car at the station.  
  
I went into some further and secret analysis about the art of sake making, about whose I found myself incredibly unlearned.  
  
But to which purpose, anyway?  
For the open irony of those three watchdogs of his?  
No, I... I can't. I couldn't survive his reproachful gaze.  
As if to tell me that what happened between us wasn't important at all.  
We both agreed it has been funny, and that's it.  
  
Sometimes, when I go out for a drink with my fellow associates, I find myself looking at the sake bottle they ordered, or even study the wine and spirits list to check whether his own sake is included.  
  
It is, of course. Almost every time. Everywhere. Obviously.  
It's just me, the one so into the French wines that couldn't even notice the quality and varieties of the rice wine of Japan.  
  
" _Hey, Dokkun._ "  
I look up. Yoko is staring at me, narrowing his eyes like he always does when there's something not quite right about some issue.  
  
" _Last time I saw you staring at a bottle with such a blank expression was during the tasting dinner we organized with Château Margaux,_ " he points out. " _But I guess that couldn't be helped back then, as it was a gorgeous wine coming straight from 1891. I can't find any connection with this sake here, but for the fact it's one of my favourites indeed."_  
  
The bad thing about having an associate which incidentally happens to be also a childhood friend, is that sometimes he should just keep his damn mouth shut and mind his own business.  
" _There isn't any, indeed_ ," I hiss begrudgingly, as I stand up to move towards the counter and pay the bill. " _I was just having a look."_  
"If you say so."  
  
That evening, at my place, I start rummaging through the papers I brought back from the salon in France.  
But it's useless, what I'm looking for is not there.  
I know I threw his visiting card away as soon as I landed in Tokyo.  
  
Maybe I've been a little too drastic.  
Sometimes I think that I'd just need to hear his melodic laugh once again, after all.  
  
Maybe we could have kept in touch and chat every now and then, like two old friends keeping a good memory of some good adventure they shared long ago.  
But then... my mind goes back to those intense eyes, the particular way he had to smile, lightning all up, that curiosity of his about seeing, doing, trying out things he wasn’t aware of yet.  
  
Who do I want to fool around?  
  
I miss you, Ohkura. Way more than I could ever admit it.  
And I liked you, so much. But I’ve just realized it, and now it's too late.  
  
" _Why did we never take into consideration the idea of selling sake here in our shop?_ " I naively ask one day, at work.  
Shingo looks up from his desk and stares at me as if he never actually saw me in his whole life.  
  
" _A proper distribution company isn’t needed for selling sake bottles, Ryo_ ," he patiently reminds me. " _Restaurants and shop do buy them directly from the producers_."  
" _That's it. Other than the distribution itself, we do also run a shop, don't we?_ "  
_"Yeah, and that's for selling exclusively French wines and spirits. French wines only, that's always been our distinctive mark and our strength. Remember?"_  
  
And suddenly, I can't cope with this conversation with him anymore.  
He's not aware of it of course, but he's throwing back on my all my current inability of working out the lump in my throat in a objective way.  
  
" _You don't need to be that sarcastic_ ," I snap, quite nervous already.  
" _It's no easy sarcasm, it's just some reality. It's what you've always wanted to do, Ryo. Sell French wines,_ " he gently adds, making me feel just an idiot after my stupid question.  
I'm not angry with him, he's always way too patient with my bad mood.  
  
" _... Are you sure you're alright, Ryo? You've been carrying this weird vibe on you ever since you came back from Bordeaux, and-"_  
"I'm not being weird," I cut him off, annoyed, grabbing my suit. " _Sorry, I'm leaving earlier today, please ask Yoko to close the shop later on."_  
"Sure, but-"  
"Thanks," I cut out, going out without looking back.  
  
I can't anymore. Seriously, I can’t.  
I know I have to stop thinking at all those "what if" and "but"; I'm drowning, sliding down way beyond the ground, losing the contact with my daily routine for a stupid, damn stupid memory.  
  
I wander around Tokyo for so long that my feet hurt.  
In the end, I notice a small ramen shop, I go in and take the darkest place in a corner, having dinner with a huge bowl and some sake. Cheering for myself.  
When I'll close my lids, tonight, he won't be there anymore.  
  
**  
  
The following day there's a lot to do at work and I'm alone in there; comings and goings until the evening, to the point that I'll be closing down in two minutes and I still haven't found the time to place on display the wooden case of the 1945 champagne I received this morning.  
  
Right after I'm finally done, I hear the door opening to another customer.  
" _I'm coming_ ," I say, as I lay the data sheets of the champagne and its price beside the bottles.  
  
When I turn around, I freeze, speechless: it's him. A few meters away from me.  
Taller than I even remembered, his wavy locks tied up.  
  
" _Hi_ ," he says in that voice I'd recognize among any other one, among any crowd’s buzz. But I'm alone now, the shop is empty and everything's echoing in my head and I cannot move at all.  
" _Sorry but... I couldn't cope with it anymore_ ," he tells me, peering deeply and intensely into me, with a gaze that is almost calling out for pain. His eyes do seem upset. I've never seen them like this before.  
  
He's waiting for me outside while I close down the gate.  
I haven't said a word yet.  
I don't know how to react. I don't know what to do. What to tell him.   
Keep silent. Wait. Wait for what, exactly?  
  
We end up having dinner at a famous yakitori chain full of people, whose bustle at least helps me not to feel the insane emptiness I'm feeling inside right now. Ominous emptiness.  
I feel deprived of my every mental process.  
But he loves meat, I hope he's feeling slightly more at ease than me.  
  
_"I had thrown away your visiting card, so I had to look for you for long_ ," he confesses, as if apologizing.  _"I had no idea in Tokyo there were so many shops about French wines."_  
"Not in Shibuya," I grumble low.  
" _Yeah, true. But I didn't remember the district you mentioned before... I'm not used to Tokyo that much after all, I never come here."_  
I nod without looking at him, as I pick up a chicken skewer from my plate.  
  
" _But... it's not the first time I come here, since last month_."  
  
Ehh?  
I open my eyes wide at him, blinking more than twice.  
  
" _It's just that... even when I finally found the right place and I distinctly saw you opening it up one morning... I didn't have the guts to come in._  
I strolled around Shibuya for hours, walking back and forth the shop window, looking at people going in and coming out, peeking inside to see whether you were actually in there, check what you were doing... and then I came back home by train, every time."  
  
Eh?  
He was here?  
He's been here more than once?  
  
" _Ryo, I.._."  
He's looking at me with a pair of eyes I'd rather sink in than avoid.  
He's feeling guilty for being here.  
He's feeling like a perfect idiot for looking openly out for me.  
  
He feels like he could have covered hundreds and hundreds of kilometers for a damn nothing, he feels like he doesn't know how to come back now that he cannot avoid having made a terrible fool of himself, in front of me. Me, the one still keeping quiet, unable to react.  
  
It's the same thing. The very same thing that prevented me from stepping in the Hyogo prefecture during the last thirty days or so.  
With the difference that he actually did it, unlike me. More than once. Even now.   
He's here.  
For me only.  
  
I feel like an idiot.  
Why did I never notice him anywhere? How come I couldn't? How come I never feel him somewhere around, somehow?  
  
I want to kiss him. Now. In front of everyone. But I cannot.  
Why didn't I do it before in the shop?  
How can I tell him? How to let him understand, if words cannot?  
  
He's saddened, shaking his head, biting his lip, looking away from me; he grabs his chopsticks back and starts eating again.  
I shift my leg, under the table, until I brush his own. And then I start rubbing repeatedly my shank very slowly and very intentionally against his own.  
He looks up at me, wild-eyed.  
  
Leg sex, right?  
Shame on me, I'm no teenager anymore.  
  
Luckily, I can be very cheeky when the moment requires such a skill, so I keep rubbing on him pretty unperturbed. He’s suddenly stopped eating and he's staring at me with such a devastating gaze I cannot. He's willingly letting me caress him like this.  
  
We walk until my place, the back of our hands barely touching, more than once, yet never openly intertwining.   
  
I don't even turn on the lights, I need to feel him on my tips, to find again his nice smell in the darkness.  
I need his naked skin.   
  
He's the one bending to kiss me; he’s trembling and thrilled while kissing me, like not even our first time was. We kiss a bit anxiously, like a couple of teenagers and it feels like pure disbelief, the way his tongue's looking for mine in my mouth, leaving both of us quite breathless afterwards.  
  
He caresses my back with both hands before slipping me off my shirt; my fingers do the same on him, scratching his shoulders, sneaking underneath his jeans to squeeze his ass.  
He's holding his breath on my mouth, for a moment.  
  
Then, he gets rid of my clothes also and we're touching each other without refrain, coming to some halt only for reaching my bed. Everything’s like we left it in Bordeaux: his choked whimpering and his hands on my chest, rousing my nipples.  
  
We’re lying in bed; I pull up his arms over his head and have them rest there with mine, while I start rubbing myself against him.  
There's a low velvety voice saying my name, so slow it's skimming self control, saying I cannot do this to him, so terribly sexy I'm moving further on him until we reach the limit.  
I cannot manage to say a word. I cannot even beg him to drive me insane.  
I can do nothing but moan and reveal my need for him, for my legs between his own ones, while he shakes his head and he's tremendously beautiful, so devastated by the pleasure breaking into us all of sudden, making me slump also on his solid body.  
  
We're gaining our breath back.  
I raise my head, looking at him. We kiss and touch each other again, however sticky and sweaty. He smiles at me. He disentangles our fingers and we lose ourselves in newfound caresses.  
  
We stay embraced for a long time, after the sex.  
I can't believe it.  
I seriously cannot believe it.  
  
" _I'm happy you came here_ ," I finally confess to him, in a whisper.  
" _I'm happy you came, too_ ," he murmurs, mellow, kissing my nape.  
" _Moron_ ," I tell him, grasping his play with words. I turn around smiling and I kiss him, and I sit on his lap for more sex, for hearing him cry aloud, letting these walls impregnate with his amazing voice.  
  
I want him so much I fear that if I close my eyes I'll eventually find out he never existed on this world.  
I don't wanna sleep tonight.  
I wanna feel him on me until exhaustion.  
  
**  
  
I crack my eyes open.  
I didn't even realize I had been dozing off.  
  
I'm feeling sore in everywhere, but he's sleeping by my side, snoring softly.  
It's dawn. I touch him with trembling fingers, beaming at the mere touch with his warm skin.  
I like it. He doesn't even flinch, he keeps sleeping so peacefully.  
  
But then there's some alarm tone ringing somewhere, and he jolts abruptly.  
" _Shit, the train... I need to catch the train..._ " he grumbles, quite groggy with sleep.  
  
" _Eh?! Are you going back already?"_  
"I have to work today... I didn't think... I never thought I would..." he's running one hand on his messy hair, sighing. " _Yesterday I had half a day off, and I took a train bound for Tokyo without even thinking thoroughly at it. I didn't think I'd have come to your shop for real. I didn't know whether..._ "  
His words trail off, and he bits his lower lip.  
  
I know. He didn't believe it could even possible for us to look for each other. To meet again.  
Me neither.  
  
" _But I can be back in a few days for the week-end... if you're okay with it_ ," he ventures, quite timidly.  
" _You needn't,_ " I retort back.  
He's biting his lip again, quite nervous.  
  
" _How about I'm coming over to see you, instead_?" I add before he can misunderstand and he blinks, slightly confused.  
" _Are you talking, like... for real?_ "  
  
I kiss him.  
I kiss him until he reluctantly pulls away in order to run away to the station.  
  
I go to work smiling like an idiot to everyone; Yoko's open frown won't impress me, though I notice for sure the look Shingo's giving him, suggesting it's better not ask a thing for the time being.  
I'm so grateful.  
  
And that's how our story actually starts, suspended between physical attraction and will power. A lot of.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Château Margaux: it's another castle in another region in Bordeaux where very famous, classy and valuable wines are produced.  
> I mention a 1891 wine: incredible as it might seem, wines bottles aged for such a long time do still exist nowadays and are still (awesomely) drinkable and very valuable. Good, old, valuable champagne wines (I mention a 1945 one) are more difficult to find, but do exist as well.  
> Shibuya: a district in Tokyo. I chose this for Ryo's French distribution company because shops selling French wines are pretty popular in there.


	3. Mount Rokko

MOUNT ROKKO, HYOGO PREFECTURE, JAPAN  
  
I'm definitely, freakingly nervous the first time I go and see Ohkura down there in the nearby of Mount Rokko, within the Nada region of the prefecture of Kobe, worldwide famous for its sake.  
  
That's how I find out that Ohkura's family is a wealthy one which has been running the sake brewery ever since the Meiji era, passing it on from father to child, one generation after another. It's grown bigger and quite modern now, to the point it can carry on the process for the sake making throughout the whole year, and not just in winter like seasonal changes required until not long ago.  
  
I'm sincerely impressed by this visit: the brewery is always open to the visitors, there are even guided tours in English.  
  
Ohkura is a toji, which means he's a professional sake maker, as much highly qualified as his father, a profession towards which the Japanese society has always looked in awe and deep respect.  
  
_"You never told me so far!_ " I soundly protests, feeling deeply embarrassed in front of his father, his brothers and their colleagues.  
_"Well, it's just you never asked_ ," he defends himself laughing.  
  
He's obviously right.  
" _Well, it wasn't..."_  
"We needn't to know, yeah," he's completing for me, with a sweet smile. He suddenly grabs my hands and squeezes it gently, without anybody noticing, while the visit goes on.  
  
Ohkura is the eldest of three brothers; all of them have grown up in the brewery, by their father’s side since they were children, together with the blonde pixie guy and the sturdy one with that contagious smile. He's always some good word for me, that guy. They were all born here, sons of farmers of this land.  
  
The short guy with weasel eyes has another background story, though; he was Ohkura's senpai at university, and among these workers I'm introduced on, together with Ohkura, he's the only young guy, who can boast such a title.  
  
In just a few hours’ spent here, I easily guess how heavy are the responsibilities upon Ohkura: a family-run brewery, his being the son of a talented father, an employee of the brewery yet an heir at the same time. Someone who’s due to work just like any other one, and harder than any other one.  
  
The structure includes a kaiseki restaurant I end up being invited in; I try to return the invitation by offering some bottles of Loire wines I brought along as a present; there's also a huge hall room hosting rakugo shows. But there's a familiar face among the actors. At least, that's what it seems to me.  
  
" _Yeah sure, it's Maru,_ " Ohkura tells me with a big smile. " _He's incredible. When we were little we were always together, and he did always sneak in here to spy on the actors. He's gotten even more talented than his masters; he's using all the spare time he's got for rehearsals and improve himself. Sometimes even during the night, on his own, alone in here._ "  
Well, you can tell they're used in working quite hard; they’re deeply tied to the nature and the sceneries, amidst these woods where there's the cleanest of waters. The most clear one you could ask for brewing a perfect sake.  
  
I'm staying at his parents' house for the night; that's where he actually lives, and I've been given a futon in the guest room.  
I cannot sleep.  
It's incredibly quiet in here, a quietness broken only by soft noises of the nature outside. I'm not used to it.  
  
All at once I realize Ohkura's here and he's slipping inside my futon.  
  
" _What the heck are you doing?!"_ , I whisper, quite shocked, as he lay down beside me. " _Your parents are beyond these paper walls!"_  
"Ssshhh," he chuckles, visibly amused.  _"If we don't do anything weird, there won’t be any noise. But I didn't wanna spend another night without you."_  
  
He shifts closer. So close.  _He smiles at me._  
"I'm so happy you're here," he whispers. __  
I feel like laughing. We do look like teenagers handling their first crush in secret.  
  
_"How come you still live with them?"_  
"Mmh... that's a very nice question… I've got an apartment in Osaka ever since I entered university; my brothers used it after me, then," he explains me, in a low voice. " _Right after I got my degree, I worked on research that led me all around Japan. When I started working here for real, I stopped by this house also on weekends, and I rarely came back to Osaka._  
Well, my job's here, I go out with friends living here and, me too, here it's where I spend most of my time, so I rented that flat to a friend. I guess this is the reason why. Sure, it might be time as well for me to look for my own place nearby, even though it's not like I ever dared to bring home people I went out with. That's just something I'm not comfortable with."  
  
My hand slips under his shirt in order to caress the naked skin of his back, and he's moaning softly, before leaning in to kiss me.  
  
" _You know, I told my parents I was gay before starting out with university_ ," he confesses me then. " _They’ve always loved me utterly, but they were shocked of course, and pretty enraged by my words. My mother slapped me and my father stopped talking to me for a long while. You got to meet him, it's not like he's actually that narrow-minded in the end, but he's indeed one of those people carrying values like a samurai._  
I didn't tell them out of spite, of course; I just wanted them to know that even if I was about to live my adult life freely, I was the very same guy as before, the very same child they had brought up. I wanted to point out I’d always be some student with a very ordinary life, just like everyone else, especially given the fact that my crushes and dates never ever interfered with my studies nor with my good grades and my work, then.  
  
As time passed by, I think they got to understand that too, and I'm grateful they did. It does not happen that often, but every time I end up crushed and heartbroken after a relationship, my mother realizes it too and prepares my favourite kara-age for me. And then, even when I've already spilled everything about it to Shochan or Maru, I end up talking about it with her, too.  
With my father it's obviously different, we never talk about these kind of things; but ever since he wanted me beside him both in the factory and in his office, a few years ago, I realized he came to accept even those parts of me he doesn't fully understand, and that he respects me for who I am. For the guy I've always been. For being just… his son."  
  
He looks at me straight in the eyes.  
_"Should you like the idea of visiting me here again, I'll make them aware of us before next time. Even though they maybe guessed it already."_  
"Ohkura, I don't want you to-"  
"You needn't say anything else, Ryo. You came all the way down from Tokyo for me only, just like I did for you. And that's all.  
Should you want to come back, please remember you'll always be welcome as a very special guest here," he smiles at me.  
  
I kiss him.  
My relationship with my family is a completely different one, I'm an awful son.  
  
Sometimes my mother calls Yoko to receive news from me, and whenever that happens and he tells me, I don't even feel guilty.  
It's not like I don't love her, but ever since I moved to live in Tokyo on my own, when I was very young, I also found my own dimension with the metropolis I love best. That's where I belong, that's my real family tie. It's with Tokyo.  
  
We fall asleep curled up together, that night, and the following day he drags me around rice paddies and woods the whole day, to see the streams of the miyamizu water, taking my hand every time he wants me to see how a plant is growing up or the way the river provides its crystal clear water down the valley.  
  
We make love inside a shed used for farming tools, the old bench screaking under the passionate thrusts of our sex play and then on a grassy meadow of a pretty nice clearing, quite hidden in the woods.  
  
We're having sex like without holding back. We don’t know when tomorrow is about to come. If there’s actually one.  
He smiles knowingly at me when he realizes I'm okay with whatever thing he wants to do with me, and about me.  
  
As soon as I go back to Tokyo I find some tiny leaves threaded into the clothes I used there, and I cannot help but giggle like an idiot. I let them wither before taking them with me in the shop to adorn a corner where I placed stones and pebbles from the Loire Valley.  
  
On my second trip to Nada, I don't know how to explain my further visit here anymore, despite him having kept his promise.  
His parents do not know about him only now, but about us also.  
  
His mother took some liking to me. I hope this was not too influenced by the rosé wine I brought to her as a present; I told her that only in the Tavel village, nestled in that part of France which is crossed by the Rhone river, we can find the production for this nectar carrying such an intense and incredible colour, that was so much appreciated both by the Sun King and the American writer Ernest Hemingway.   
  
During the dinner I told her I'm in love with this wine because it resembles some skilled yet humble weaving, one of those captivating bottles catching your attention straight at first sight. And once you've tasted them, you cannot let go anymore.   
I looked up, finding Ohkura's eyes sweetly peering into mine.  
  
I'm not as equally lucky with his father, though, so I guess it'll be quite harder for me if I might ever want to gain some trust from him.  
Shibutani-san does not like me, either; I seriously don't know why he's looking that scornful to me, given the fact I got some glimpses of him making out with the blond pixie guy behind the brewery. More than once.  
  
Ohkura pouted in a vaguely warm way when I asked him further details.  
  
_"Well, it's some very long and complicated story, the one between those two_ ," he explains me. " _Sho-chan fell madly in love with him as soon as he noticed him, back then. He had come to pay me a visit at university, you know. But Shibuyan is some reticent guy, somehow. He's reserved and very introvert-like, it's definitely hard to get to know what's going on in his mind. You can tell there's something way more complex than physical attraction drawing them to each other, yet for the very same reason it's difficult for them to come ahead of everything, most of the time. But they cannot stay away from each other for long, anyway. Never."_  
  
I stare at him for long, silently, as he loses himself thinking deeply at the future of his best friends.  
It seems like he just talked about us also. But maybe it's just me imagining things.  
  
**  
  
When I next arrive in the Rokko valley, I find Ohkura waiting for me outside the station, riding a huge and sparkling motorbike. He smiles at my dumfounded face while handing me a helmet.   
  
" _You're now being introduced to my most faithful mate_ ," he chuckles, tenderly smoothing the surface of the metallic body with his hand.  
" _So where exactly were you hiding this one?_ " I ask, climbing carefully onto the bike, behind him.  
  
_"Nowhere,_ " he laughs. " _Actually, I couldn't wait to let you see this. I have to drive for work sometimes, but I do sure eat up more miles with this motorbike, and it's sooooo much better. It's the ideal around here, feeling the wind right on the skin. I'm sure you'll like it a lot. Please hold on tight to me, okay?"_  
I obey, hugging him and flattening myself against his solid back. Not that I even mind.   
  
He brings me on a ride around, visiting each of the sake breweries of the Nada district, the one I see depicted on a few promotional posters in the hall of some of these factories.  
There's a long band of ground running all along the coast between the cities of Kobe and Osaka, and it's here we can find tons of sake breweries and rice paddies among the flow of five rivers running down the Mount Rokko area up until the harbours.  
  
We've being welcomed enthusiastically every time we stop by in one of those.  
There's no-one who does not know where Ohkura comes from and they all respect his professionalism, though he's the one looking humble the most, quite curious to taste their sake still on fermentation tanks, asking if they did improve the process and how to.   
  
Taking a look means learning, confronting each other means improving, and nobody here is left behind. They're all getting benefits from this know-how exchange, ever since something like 260 years already.  
  
I attended quite a lot of sommelier courses, organized small seminars and classes in order to introduce people to the world of French wines; I prepared tasting events, gala dinners, products line-up and presentations, but now I realize the huge universe running around the wine rice was definitely and totally unknown to me.  
  
I learn a lot of new things beside him, so many my head's spinning like crazy, trying to keep up with my insatiable curiosity; but then, a kiss is enough to soothe me, one single kiss stolen between one visit and the following one.   
  
It starts raining cats and dogs while we're still on those outskirts, a summer storm coming out of nowhere really. We're drenched already when we reach the shelter provided by an old abandoned temple.  
  
" _Darn_ ," Ohkura says frowning openly, as he hands me a very helpful towel he carried inside the bags of his motorbike.  _"That's definitely not how I thought to end up today..."_  
"Oh, really?! So I was the only one thinking you planned it all to ambush me in here?!" I retort back, grinning like evil.  
He bursts out laughing, throwing his head backwards like he's used to, and then there's this very stupid butterfly-like emotion taking possession of my chest.  
  
Then, it's in the moment that follows, as I look at the scenery out of the porch; I get suddenly caught by some incredible, sudden and disruptive perception. I walk to sit right there, while the rain intensity is slowly decreasing.  
  
_"What's up?_ " he asks me, sitting quietly beside me.  
I cannot answer promptly. I close my eyes, listening carefully at what's all around me.  
  
The rain here is completely different from Tokyo.  
It's pattering each leaf softly, one by one. It's some shy and delicate noise. Somehow, a choral one, at the same time.  
  
" _It's different in here,_ " I comment quietly, opening my eyes once again.  
" _Different from what?_ " he asks me with curiosity, cocking his head to one side to look better at me.  
From my world, I'd like to reply. But I cannot, and I don't even know myself the reason why.  
  
He reaches out for kissing me.  
" _I'm so happy you're here with me_ ," he slowly whispers on my lips. I smile in the kiss that follows.  
  
It's really so quite different in here, but if there's one more thing we can say, it's the geographical distance does not damage our physical connection of an inch.  
It's so great, really.  
I needn't ask him anything, nor he has to, with me.  
  
He just wants me to slip him off his clothes and meet him through the most natural way we came to learn.  
  
It happens, sometimes, that I arrive at his place with my head still full with the schedule I have in Tokyo, the business meetings, the courses... and Ohkura does understand it all. That's when he brings me inside the intimacy of his room, takes off my clothes and takes care of me.  
He especially likes sucking me off, hearing me moan for his dedicated attentions. Just like our first time.  
  
As for me, I like having him between my legs and let my fingers sink into his dark, thick and wavy mane, pulling it hard as he drives me crazy.  
We see each other as often as we can and make love as so, as if we were into some forbidden relationship.  
Sometimes, when his parents go out in the evening, their home is quite empty thus quite all for the two of us. We slip off our clothes while climbing the steps to the first floor, bring the garments with us until his room, where we do have sex as if time never existed.  
  
" _Tell me more about your wines_ ," he asks me one day right after the orgasm, his voice still slightly hoarse. " _Tell me about all those people who are taking care of vineyards, the one that got the chance to taste them throughout the centuries, the landscapes and the terroirs and the scents and the whole universe fusing together into just one bottle... as if in some magic. Such incredible magic.._."  
He sighs slowly.  
  
I'm rather taken aback, while he covers my face with tiny feather kisses. All my love stories were brought to some nervous end by blaming my work. My work was taking all the best from me, they said, leaving behind to the love only the leftovers.  
  
" _It's the very same for the sak_ e," I tell him with an amazed smile, caressing his head.  
" _Uhm... if you say so, but I'm not that good in telling stories and all those details and historic references like you do_ ," he insists.  
  
" _They're all true stories, the one I tell to my customers. But they're not mine. In the end, French wine is not something that belongs to me_ ," I try to make him understand. " _The rice wine belongs to you, though. You're the one creating it._ "  
  
He blushes faintly from embarrassment.  
" _You're saying it as if it was some precious things_ ," he murmurs slowly.  
" _It is. That's exactly what you patiently taught me,_ " I tell him.  
  
He shift closer, kissing me again. We spend the night talking about wine shades and scents, war chronicles that had people toast with loads of beers, temples blessed through sake and monks that created the most celebrated sparkling wine in the whole world.  
  
When Ohkura falls asleep in my arms, there's some faint smile still lingering on his face. His room is crammed with books, essays, novels, research papers and analysis sheets about sake; they're all full of notes, scribbled on margins, covered in post-its notes and crumpled bookmarks.   
  
Because that's exactly how he is: curious, careful in not letting any single detail to go wasted.  
He’s bright and smart, as much clever as I could rarely see on this world so far.  
He’s… so much.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1\. What I mention above about the Toji profession is true, but for the fact that in a sake brewery only a toji is usually required, while in this story I mention three people: Ohkura, his father and Subaru.  
> 2\. Tavel: what Ryo tells Ohkura's mother about this wine is equally true. It's a very old rosé wine you can find in the Rhone region, in France.  
> 3\. Miyamizu water: it's one of the "secret ingredients" of the quality of the sake coming from the Hyogo prefecture, together with the YamadaNishiki rice variety (yeah, it's funny it's an 'eito pairing' name XD), and the wind coming from the Rokko Mountain.


	4. Tokyo, Nada

TOKYO, NADA  
  


When it's Ohkura’s turn to visit me in Tokyo, he's almost ashamed of putting his feet inside my shop, during his first time there; I guess it's because of those expensive vintage bottles he sees through the shop window, and maybe also because of Yoko and Shingo's presence.  
 

If they came and suspect something about my renewed brightness at work, now they know about it. I mean, about him.

Not that I talked about it openly, but apparently that wasn't needed.  
 

One day, I'm almost asking my associate friends to come along with me and Ohkura for a drink on Friday evening, as soon as he'll be arrived at the station; but then, surprisingly enough, Shingo anticipates me by asking whether it's okay to invite him to the karaoke.  
 

I'm about to burst into some laughter, seriously. I'm not that bad at singing, but Shingo is definitely deaf-toned and so is Yoko; which is weird, because Yoko's got some sensual note in his voice, something that is pretty helpful for our sales both in the shop and for our distribution network.

That's why I appreciate their effort way more than I could ever say aloud; however, later on that night, Ohkura and me are bound to bring my drunken friends safely back home.  
 

Yoko insists for stopping by at Shingo's place, saying his couch will go.

I remind him he's the one taking the shift in the shop tomorrow morning, for I have already arranged my weekend with someone who had to cope with the usual five hundred kilometers just in order to see me.  
 

Shingo does confirm his couch will go, given the fact it has already seen way too many of Yoko's hangovers.

Well, such an anecdote was unknown to me, but I have to say I would have been okay even without knowing about it at all.

We leave them both on such a couch anyway, pretty confident they'll survive the night.  
 

They were both astonished by Ohkura's crystal clear voice; after a couple of drinks he relaxed his nerves and he started singing almost like a pro. Hikaru Udada, The Beatles and the Red Hot Chili Peppers.   
 

When they literally forced him to sing Sakamoto Kyu's "Ue wo muite arukou", that was the apotheosis.

Ohkura was singing while crying at the same time, I was crying while listening to him, and my two fellow associates had started snivelling shamelessly. Well, talking about songs that can cheer people up...

Of course it was no news to me that he was a talented guy, as for what warbling is concerned.  
 

_"I'm very sorry,"_ Ohkura murmurs on our way back home. " _In the end, they allowed me to sing longer than due. They should have had more time for their own songs."_

_"Are you nuts?!_ " I retort, bewildered.  _"I'd pay anything just in order not to having to hear those two guys singing, especially when they pair up together! Didn't you see how fun they had just by dancing like crazy on the sofas?! This is some huge problem, the one starting today..._ " I grumble, snorting.  
 

_"What do you mean?"_

_"Whenever you'll be coming to Tokyo, Ohkura, they'll be more than eager and ready to kidnap you at least once for doing karaoke again, and that means even less time for us..._ " I confess, slightly ashamed of my possessiveness.   
 

He cracks up in a delicious laughter and takes my hand, and never let it go anymore, humming happily until my place, until he repeats in my ear that time is everything for us especially, but that whenever we're together, time is there for us only.

I do believe him for sure. That's how it is.  
 

The following morning, Shingo's calling to tell me Yoko is in no condition for leaving his apartment. And so is him.

I slam the phone down on them. They'll pay for this. Both of them, they will.  
 

I had planned to take Ohkura to the Matsuri in Ueno and spend there a whole day of relaxing idleness on the park grass, at least until the evening. I'm forced, instead, to take him to the shop with me after he insists for helping me out and... well, he might know almost nothing about French wines, but he's obviously strikingly good with our customers.

I should have remembered about him in his booth in Bordeaux, his being used to welcome visitors on daily basis at the brewery.  
 

I get distracted. So much. I end up staring proudly at him way more often than I should.  
 

At lunch time we're busy in the warehouse with other playful activities. I have to admit this kinda perverse vein running deep within me is cheering at the thought of having him in here, unbeknownst to the couple of idiots without whose silly behaviour all of this would have never actually happened. For it's quite fascinating indeed, stripping him here, taking him to the limit among the scent of the wooden cases and the feeble wine aroma you can smell around here and there. And then there's his hoarse voice, asking me to have more of it, a lot more, always more.  
 

When we close down the shop for a week around mid-August and the sake brewery is closed as well, I cannot believe we can see each other for more than a mere couple of days. I can't believe I don't have to waste my time on trains while thinking at what the heck I am doing with my life.  
 

I retrieve him at the station and then we end up straight having sex in my apartment; for the first time ever, we're no prisoner of time.

We spend our first days like that, naked in bed. And I seriously won't ever get tired of seeing him sleeping that peacefully.

Whenever his lids get open, he's mine again, even before he's fully awake.  
 

Then, as soon as his stomach protests, he scampers 'till the dining room and immediately comes back, struck by some idea.

He wants to cook for me all the time during these days in exchange for the hospitality. That's when I tell him I want to pay for the food he's going to buy when we'll go down to the conbini together.  
 

He sulks and then talks about doing my laundry instead, and even having the bathroom all cleaned up for me.

I reply by telling him that if he insists, he can wear a frilly apron and fuck me with that on, if he really likes the idea, but he won't ever be my housekeeper, that's definitely out of question. He pouts, then cracks up.  
 

We laugh a lot. So much.

We spend our time talking, eating, confronting each other about our work, slumping exhausted on my bed sheets, getting asleep and then having sex again. A lot of awesome sex.  
 

We're laying one beside the other in bed like that, simply blessed by our own tangible presence. And what is absent, is the hustle and bustle of our daily routines.  
 

Having to wave him bye when those seven days are definitely over is even more cruel, afterwards.

At Shinagawa station I cannot help but protest like a pampered brat, seriously, I can't take my hands off his hips.  
 

" _We'll be together again in just a very few days_ ," Ohkura reassures me, leaving an affectionate peck on my forehead. 

I cannot say a word anymore, so he bends and parts my lips to kiss me for long, deeply and intensely, amidst the crowd getting on and off the platforms. When he lets me go, he's offering me the sweetest gaze ever.  
 

I can barely notice there's a few people staring shocked at us.

I don't care a damn.  
 

" _HEY!"_ I shout out at Ohkura who is walking away from me, and there's also some stranger turning back to my loud voice.

" _Next time_..." I go on, talking aloud, until my voice trails off.

" _Sure,"_ he grins at me, his lips opening up into an intriguing smile. He winks at me knowingly. " _Sure, next time_."

 

And then, it's not only Tokyo nor Nada anymore.

We're seeing each other halfway, at the matsuri in the Osu district of Nagoya or in a hotel room somewhere, like a forbidden couple.

We go and see the Naruto whirpools that he had not had the chance to see anymore ever since he visited them with his family when he was a little child.  
 

That very same weekend we're going together to the Awa Odori Matsuri in Tokushima, and his mother insists for lending me a yukata belonging to Ohkura's younger brother. As for Ohkura, he's constantly holding my hand that evening, without any shame. I let him do. I belong to him, I do feel the same.

But the more I get into his world and have him into mine, the more we do learn how hard it is to wake up every morning without having the other one beside.  
 

It's been almost two months of us, in a blink of an eye. It's a relationship made up of hours and hours spent on train, timetables, sometimes even flights, of dates planned by chasing the time and of dinners in the restaurants I'm serving as good customers, so that he's also finding out a whole new world he barely knew about, until not so long ago.  
 

He likes tasting the wine I sell, and he's a glutton for food. For whichever kind of food.

We meet in a hotel in Shizuoka once, and the following day we're trying the famous eel dishes in Hamamatsu; he ends up eating like crazy so we next have to skip going to see the famous sand dunes in Nakatajima Sakyu. We stay locked in the hotel instead, with his stomach ache.

I can't bear to see him suffer. I seriously cannot, it makes me feel anxious and terribly worried for him. It's something I had never experienced before.  
 

**  
 

We're naked, lying on our stomach on the grass, in the tiny clearing amidst the woods whose hidden trail I got to learn myself, in the end. 

It's freaking hot down in the valley today, but it feels good in here.  
 

He's taking a nap while I fight with the ants who seem to be attracted to me only.

Then, I brush his warm skin and he open his lids, taking me slightly aback.  
 

" _You really like doing it amidst the nature, don't you?_ "

He's looking at me in a way that makes me understand he knows -I seriously don't know how- I'm thinking back at that night on the shore in Bordeaux, and he cracks up.  
 

_"Don't you appreciate it_?" He asks me then, turning on one side to peer better at me.

" _I do. And so do those ants, I guess_ ," I mumble, banishing some more from our blanket.

_"Ants go crazy during this season_ ," he admits, pretty amused.  
 

_"I'm glad I'm not the only one, then..."_

_"You told me you needed to relax,_ " he retorts back, grinning, "s _o I just did my best in order to grant your wish_."  
 

Yeah. Relax.

Tonight I'll be having a tasting dinner with my French wines in Osaka, an event that a few new potential customers will attend. It'd be good for our distribution.  
 

Ohkura will be there as well. He cannot wait for coming over. He insisted for paying his quota for the dinner just like everyone does, even when I insisted for refusing to accept it.

He obviously won the argument that followed.  
 

" _I've been actually coming here ever since I was a child, you know_?" he confesses me then, out of the blue. 

" _I used to roll up and down the meadow for hours and hours, and whenever I came back home and my cheeks and clothes were all dirty with green, my mother shouted furiously at me._

_It's my very secret place that I found one day by chance, when I got lost after walking around here with my father._

_I never brought anyone else here, before_."  
 

I let the news seep down within me. For we came here, er… a lot of times to say the least.  
 

And then there's some other thing striking me at once.

He loves the freedom that these places grant him. He loves it like crazy.  
 

You can feel it in Tokyo too, that very particular sense of freedom, but it's definitely of some other kind of one. It's as if Tokyo allows you to be whoever one you want to be, giving you whatever chance you may ask for.

Ohkura does already know who he wants to be; when he's in his hometown, it's as if his personality could even get brightened by what's around him.  
 

Then I straddle him, I start kissing him everywhere and he moans his utter pleasure in a hoarse voice when I nip at his skin, and he's placing his hands on my hips and we're making love again.

He gasps fiercely when I seep deep inside of him, his thighs are shaking impatiently, and there's my name coming out as a trembling sigh from his lips, and that's the most beautiful sound ever heard on Planet Earth.   
 

That's where my freedom lies. Here with him.  
 

I do look like a quiet guy, but that's just the surface; I'm always on the go, in the need for incentives and things to do. I love my work utterly also because among all other things, I'm also granted all of this.  
 

But it's true that when I started dating Ohkura, I cannot deny I came to love the most unexpected moments ever. Like when it's the two of us sitting on the threshold of his parents' house with bottles of beer in our hands, looking up at the stars in the huge sky in the silence of the night. Stars are seriously tons, in here.

More than once, he interrupts my mystic contemplation with a silent kiss on the neck. Right after that, the mystic contemplation does usually become of some different kind.  
 

One day Ohkura brings me to the onsen. While bathing, I suspect there might have been some random moment when the crazy thought of never leaving that place anymore crossed my mind.

After the spa and a luscious moment of wild sex in our favourite clearing, he  drags me away to climb the ropeway offering a full length panorama of Kobe and Osaka together, with the bay opening up below us. We're alone, and he takes my hand.  
 

" _It's basically behind your house, yet you still had to bring me here_ ," I tell him.

" _True, I didn't_ ," he confirms me, nodding with a smile.  
 

I don't ask him why. There's no need.

My hold on his hand tightens while I look at the scenery.  
 

It's weird.

It's as if everything becomes sort of amplified, in here.  
 

I thought there was no other place like Tokyo where colours, lights, buzzes and people would mix together, giving shape to a whole global mass, and to a unique, only sound. The sound of Tokyo.

But here, it's as if each of the elements would become all one with the environment around it, instead. It's so freaking weird.

 

The sake that keeps being produced in here enshrines it all inside; that's what I'm slowly but steadily getting to learn, day by day.

I often come back to Tokyo with some special sake for Shingo and Yoko. Ah, yeah... if those guys ever held some doubts about Ohkura, they've soon become his number one fans. Jeez. I don't know whether I should cheer about the fact they openly prefer him to me.  
 

It's definitely true he's a great guy, and not only in bed; he's truly a professional about sake, and that makes him even sexier to my eyes. To the point I seriously need to see him while at work, so that I conspire with Maru and Shota without him knowing, arriving unexpectedly in Hyogo during an afternoon when he expects me to be attending a non-existent Master Class about Alsace in Hokkaido.  
 

I bought his friends with the promise of a fabulous dinner in a classy restaurant in Tokyo, so they pick me up at the station and bring me to the brewery. I manage to spy on him through a tiny window of the factory; I finally get to observe him for hours without him noticing, and he's working hard for sure, dressed in that dark green apron of his. He's so beautiful I'm about to get emotional.  
 

That's probably when I slip from the stool they provided me with, tumbling down. I guess I have to say bye to my little hiding place. Darn.

A few people are coming to check what's happened.  
 

" _What the heck... Ryo?! Oh Kami-sama, Ryo, are you hurt?!"_

_"Hi... no, no, sorry_..." I say, and fumble some more apologies while I stand back on my feet and reassure them all I'm really fine.

I made a complete fool of myself, darn. I'm the biggest idiot on Earth.  
 

" _Why are you here, Ryochan?! Do you want me dead from the shock?!"_

_"You did it too, back then!_ " I remind him with an evil grin, and he cracks up.  
 

" _You're right,_ " he murmurs, brushing his face with the back of his hand. " _I've been terrible."_

_"It's all thanks to you,_ " I remark. " _If that day you wouldn't have... er..."_ my words trail off, quite embarrassed when I realize we're talking with his colleagues listening, but luckily, they all soon go back to their workplaces.  
 

" _I must go back to work, too_ ," he says, in saddened voice.

_"I won't leave without you_ ," I assure him, and he smiles at me.  
 

While I wait for his shift to be over, I chat for long with his friends sitting in the hall of the brewery.

They tell me about him as a child, they tell me about a teenager with beaver teeth, about the man he's become and the fact he's always the last one leaving the brewery, staying there long after the closing time. 

Being a daddy's boy here does not mean at all having chosen the easier path.  
 

Shibutani-san join us. He nods at me, sits beside Shota and slowly-but-not-casually intertwines their fingers together.

Whatever grudge he might have had towards me, it's gone now.  
 

As soon as Ohkura arrives, we slip out of the group.

I have to be back to Tokyo immediately this time, because Yoko accepted to change two shifts in a row with me just a few days ago, and I need to return him more than one favour.  
 

_"Please make me come back with you_ ," he begs me panting hard, while we're making love desperately, checking on the hour.

" _Please make me come back with you, please, please_ ," he repeats. " _You shouldn't have, you didn't have to come here, you weren't supposed to,_ " he whines slowly, giving in to my caresses.  _"Because right now, I..._ "  
 

I kiss him, getting dressed back once he's calmed down. I give in, too, to his request, under the promise he'll be coming back here in order to attend the meeting he's got with the administration guys tomorrow evening.  
 

We're catching the train together, talking about everything and nothing for all the time. We spend the night together, and the following morning he's by my side, walking me to the shop. Shingo is so discreet once in there, he disappears in the warehouse so that we can kiss for longer, before he's off.   
 

I cannot help but think about how it would be to have him here with me every morning. But if so, he wouldn't be the one he is, born and grown up in the environment he's got at home.

I shouldn't think about it, I know. But there's no way we can cancel this damn distance, and using Skype isn't always helping.

 

**  
 

We have a furious argument the day he finds out I'm lying about my health, telling him we had to cancel our date because of some sudden work in the shop, when I'm feverish instead. Maybe it's flu, I don't know.

The thing is, Ohkura's turning up on my doorstep, because Yoko cannot keep his damn mouth shut.  
 

I open the door only because after I refused to answer to his phone calls, he's started ringing the doorbell in order to burst my eardrums and my headache was terrible even before all of this. Guess how I'm feeling after this gentle concert.   
 

He's livid.  
 

_"Why didn't you tell me you were not okay?_!" He bursts out, coming in despite me keeping the door half closed.

_"Why telling me a lie?! Did you really hope I'd have never found the truth?_!"  
 

Did I hope for that? Yeah, sure. I hate feeling weak and hate even more having to admit it. And I did know he had a terrible schedule at work this week.  
 

" _It's nothing serious, really_ ," I tell him. " _I didn't want you to worry for nothing, it's not that hard to realize..."_

_"I happen to worry especially because it's so easy to know when you're lying, Ryo!"_  he barks, but his voice's coming out half a snarl and half a sob. " _I don't want you to... I don't want you to think you'd better hide some part of you from me,_ " he adds then, lowering his voice, pretty hurt.

His eyes are pleading me, that's how he's going on with a speech he's become unable to carry on by voice only.

I cannot look at his face anymore, either.  
 

" _Just go away_ ," I snort.

" _No way I'm going away."_

_"Just go away, I said."_

_"And I said no. Carry me away bodily, if you can. I bet you can't."_

The fight goes on for hours, because I seriously cannot manage to throw him outta here despite I’m perfectly aware of the fact he should be back to work, like, right now. These days are crazy in Nada.

And still, he called his father to ask for a extra permit and then he stays with me, watching whether I'm taking the pills or not, staying awake at night to check on my sleep. I cried from anger before giving in, and he pretended not to see the tears I didn't want him to see, while he held me tight to his chest.  
 

I didn't want him to do any of this. I didn't want him to come.  
 

I don't wanna him to start feeling some obligation towards me. We keep on seeing each other because we want to, and not because we're building up something from this relationship.  
 

We cannot believe it's something different from simple desire, even though we're trying our best to ignore all the signals, becoming more and more clear, one day after another.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1\. "Ue wo muite arukou" is a worldwide famous song interpreted in the '60s by the actor and composer Sakamoto Kyu, whose role in the TV drama 'Totto Terebi' (about the life of the actress Kuroyanagi Tetsuko) had been assigned to none other than our Nishikido Ryo ;)  
> I recommend the drama if you're interested in some portion of the history of Japanese TV broadcasting, it's very nicely handled.  
> 2\. Alsace is a region of France in which white wines are produced.  
> 3\. All the turistic places and matsuri mentioned are real, included the ropeway of Mount Rokko offering the panorama of the cities of Kobe and Osaka.


	5. Two Worlds

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I kinda expected to post this waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay sooner but... RL, sorry. And the translation seriously needed to be revised so it took me so long to fix.  
> Sorry.  
> Anyway, this is the last chapter indeed and I hope you enjoy!  
> Thanks for sticking to this story till the very end!

He's calling to tell me this week he won't make it. No train bound for Tokyo to jump in, this time, for he must stay at home: in the weekend, he'll be busy with his father and the board of directors of the company for business meetings.  
 

_"I'm so sorry. But I promise I'll grant you a surprise next time you'll be coming here."_

_"You needn’t."_

_"I need to do that, instead. Please."_  
 

His voice is tired. He is tired and strained lately, even though he's making all the efforts he can in order to hide that from me. I wonder whether he might get a glimpse of the very same thing from my face. I wonder way too often, lately, for how long we'll endure all of this.  
 

It's not easy at all.

Despite the fierce physical desire, despite the strong need to see each other, despite... the feelings. It's not easy at all, handling all of this.  
 

_"Ohkura... please don't overdo. Please_ ," I plead him, and my voice is strong and steady.

I'd obviously like to have him here. But above anything else, I want him to be okay.

_"Don't worry_ ," he reassures me with a chuckle,  _"we don't have the same crazy work schedules that you carry on in the metropolis."_

Mmh, after I saw him in the brewery I wouldn't be so sure; and he's the one in charge for getting to learn how to run things, one day.  
 

" _It's just... I think I'll be busy at least until Sunday afternoon, so.._." he stops, as if to find the most appropriate words. " _Coming all the way to Tokyo and then back again, it's demanding_."

I know.

I'd love to go to him instead, if only I had not just promised Shingo to take his shift this weekend. He asked for it months ago, I cannot fail to keep my word.

It hurts, being unable to see each other. To touch him. To let him realize, through this very eyes of mine, how much I miss him.  
 

_"Are you angry, Ryochan?"_

Ryochan.

He's been addressing me like that for a while already, and every time I feel my heart melting in a way I cannot control.

No one's ever called me like that ever since I was a child, but hearing that from him is so damn relaxing.  
 

_"Should I be angry because you care for your work as much as I do with mine?"_

_"Well, you know-"_

_"Hey."_

_"Mh?"_

_"Sex over the phone. How does that sound?"_

_"... pretty cheeky you are, today_ ," he quietly replies, holding his breath.  
 

_"Sex over the phone,_ " I insist, articulating the words in a slower way, " _wanna do that?"_

Silence over the line.

I wonder whether he might be blushing. Or even, chewing his lip.  
 

" _... are you serious?"_

_"Never done that before, haven't you?_ " I ask, quite curious, after these naive comments of his.

_"Eh? No, I-"_

_"Really?! Never done that?! You seduced me with your eyes only in a foreign country, you got me naked there in a tiny toilet, yet you never made any erotic phone call?!" I_  giggle, taken totally aback.

_"I love having sex, but I've never had any long-distance relationship so far," he candidly confesses. "So... I just reckon I never had the chance. That's it."_

_"So, how about it? Trying it out with me?"_

_"Now?"_

_"No, I thought... Sunday could go. Just let me know when you'll be done, so that I'll be calling you afterwards."_

_"Okay."_

_"Good."_

_"Ryochan... do you want me entirely naked before calling you?"_

I burst out laughing.

" _Surprise me, Ohkura,_ " I tell him sweetly.  _"You always manage to do that_."  
 

When I hang up, there's an idiotic smile invading my whole face, and Yoko is staring at me, perplexed. 

Oops. I didn't even hear him come in, here in the warehouse.

_"Please do spare me the rest,_ " he gloomily comments.  _"And I'll spare you my comments, in exchange._ "

I grin terribly at him, then help him packing up a few cardboard boxes. I know he adores Ohkura, somehow, and he's just being envious.  
 

_"You must really like him a lot_ ," he casually blurts out then, rather unexpectedly.

_"As if you didn't, as well,_ " I immediately reply, without even thinking. " _And please don't tell me you don't prefer him openly to me, because I won't believe you."_

Yoko glares at me, blushing faintly.  
 

When I come back home, that evening, I'm still thinking at that phone call. At Yoko's words.

Shit. Why does it have to be so complicated?

I'm deeply... involved in this already.

Trying to deceive myself is foolish. Useless.  
 

I've fallen in love with Ohkura.  
 

I'm mad over heels with him and I'm happy about it. He makes me feel good, so good that sometimes I just have to close my eyes and think back at his roaring laughter, to have my nerves soothed at such a memory.

And it seems to me like a whole lifetime has passed since the day I accidentally bumped into him in that toilet, in France.  
 

How many steps did we make together, since then?

How many kilometers did we cover in order to cancel the distance, merely geographical, between us?  
 

When I wake up on Monday morning, I'm lying on my back, still dazed by the pleasure evoked during the night I spent over the phone with him.

I close my lids and can still hear his voice moaning and pleading me to stop torturing him like that, before changing into a blessed cry.  
 

It happens indeed again, to make each other feel the pleasure like this, when we're forced to stay far from each other.

It happens after some other missed meetings due to my work schedule, his own one, the lack of time, the tiredness that sometimes makes him fall asleep on a chair in the station while he was waiting, thus missing his train bound for Tokyo.

And every time it happens, as soon as we get to meet again we do apologize to each other for having not made it in time, for not having resisted longer.  
 

However roaring, his beautiful laughter is still too far away, through the phone.

I have him with Skype installed on his computer also, now, so that sometimes the rated video calls have the upper hand on the phone calls.

I can see him squirm for the pleasure I make him feel, yet I cannot touch him. And I don't know what's worse, honestly.  
 

I realize I have to do something; after a few nights spent fully awake, I slip into my jeans and rush into my little study, rummaging around my latest market research, the visiting cards of some clients I could count on, remembering the considerations I made with Shingo and Yoko.

I don't know whether it's possible or not, yet.

But I won't stop before having tried with all my might.   
 

Now, every day after the work, unless I'm leaving for Nada or he's arriving in here, I shut myself at home and start collecting names, phone numbers; I organize work meetings and ask my fellow associates for all their help and to share with them all the experience they can.

Weeks pass by. There's hard work in between, other dates, whispers left on my mouth and night spent in his futon, in the quietness of his parents' house in the Nada region.

*  
 

I crack my eyes open. Dawn has still to come, but he's already awake, tenderly looking at me.

_"Hey,_ " he murmurs, unspeakable affection marking his beautiful voice.

_"Hey,_ " I reply, stirring.

_"This afternoon I'll be carrying out some things in town for my parents, but I asked Maru to not let you get bored alone in the meantime_ ," he tells me. " _I won't be away for long anyway, and as soon as I'll be back... well, I'm inviting you out for dinner tonight. The two of us only_ ," he says, stealing a kiss from my lips.  
 

He booked a table at a kaiseki restaurant which has got on display a lot of awesome French bottles on its walls. I realize, amazed, that it happens to be a relatively new customers of ours, that I still had not had the chance to pay a visit at.

It's no formal dinner, but Ohkura is dressed to the nines. Also, he's shaved his beard, his nape, and cut his wavy hair short.  
 

I'm slightly bewildered when I see him, maybe because I've been asking the barber the very same haircut for a lifetime by now.

He looks slightly younger like this, yet it's still pretty hard for me to look up at Ohkura without feeling relentlessly and terribly attracted to him, as if I just got to meet him.

He's so damn sexy.  
 

He's staring intensely at me throughout the whole dinner, though never daring to talk about anything else but the delicious food, the wine and the sake we're tasting.

I realize the moment of a confrontation has finally come, but I wait until we're outside of the restaurant; after thanking profusely the whole staff for the awesome service they granted us, we take a stroll.  
 

_"How about telling me what you're thinking about, Ohkura?"_

He does not answer immediately, so I intertwine our fingers together, to encourage him to speak.

" _Does it have something to do with your new haircut?"_

_"Eh?!_ " he blinks, shaking his head. " _No, no, this is... er, dunno, that happened by chance this afternoon, before coming back home,_ " he tells me absentmindedly, running his fingers to ruffle the short bangs. " _I was passing by a few shop windows, I saw my reflection and I suddenly thought that I felt like changing a bit. That's just it,_ " he shrugs in the end.  
 

A few more steps, and still, silence.

Should I tell him I find him rather sexy or would it worsen the already weird, tensed vibe lingering between us tonight?  
 

_"So what is it, that you wanted to tell me about?_ " I insists. He stiffens, biting his lip.

I realize he's extremely embarrassed, and possibly even more nervous than before, with the result that this makes me more nervous than him as well.

_"Is it something bad?"_

_"No!_ " he shrieks out.  _"Well, maybe, maybe it is, I... I... I like you, Ryochan."_

He stops dead, to look at me straight in the eyes.

_"I like you, meaning that I've fallen in love with you. I'm sorry. I didn't have to, I know I didn't have to, we... there's this huge, strong physical attraction between us, that's true indeed. We moved towards each other for this, and for this only, right? Without never asking one another anything more than that, but then... I don't know, I... the way I feel, Ryochan, is way stronger than the mere desire._

_Truth is, sex alone would have never been a strong enough motive for making me doing all that I've done lately._

_And I got to understand that it's been this feeling, that allowed me to catch the first train at dawn and the last one in the night, during these awesome months."_

He stops talking for a moment. My eyes are still into his own.

I let him go on, and his gaze suddenly sweetens.  
 

" _You have... you are so attractive. You're gifted with a lively, vibrant brain I find so damn sexy, and you've got this curious, tireless spirit that makes you so devoted to your work, so committed to it, through a monstrous passion of yours. Among many other things, I strongly admire you because you're such a pro. Truly, such a pro. And even, well... you're incredible in bed. You still get to blush sometimes when I take your arousal in my mouth, and believe me if I dare say I've never seen anything more adorable than that, did you know?"_

I cannot say a word.

Where is his speech aiming at? I'm not prepared for this, not at all.  
 

" _We.. well, we've tried so hard, we're still trying hard with all our willpower, but it's not like I don't understand we cannot go after one another like crazy for the rest of our life, Ryochan,_ " he adds then.  _"I do not wish for this, at least. So... I don't know what to do. I'm at a loss, I honestly don't know how to deal with this. Because I don't know how to keep far away from you anymore, nor stay away from my work, just like you do._

_This is my selfishness, Ryochan. I wanted you to know about it, before the summer comes to its end and then... the autumn will be tough for us both, at work."_

_"Why are you deciding it all by yourself?_ " I bark then, in a broken voice. I hate myself.

_"Eh?"_

_"Why are you talking like it's over already?! Why are you talking as if there's no other chance?!"_

_"No, I-"_

_"Now shut up. Please."  
_

I grab him by the nape and kiss him quite nastily. But then, I melt in his mouth and we make out for long, at the edge of some little road amidst the rice paddies and a lone, dim lamp post above us.  
 

When I pull back, letting him go, his thumb is tenderly wiping away a tear from my cheek. A tear I was not aware of.

_"I'm sorry,_ " he tells me. " _That's why I hesitated this long about my feelings for you. I don't want them to affect you, Ryochan, but I don't even wanna deny them anymore. I can't, anymore."_

_"And where exactly are you putting mine?_ " I retort back, scowling.  
 

His ingenuous eyes open wide. Sometimes I wonder how these two opposite souls can co-exist so well deep within him, the cheeky one together with his pure, tender and most innocent side.

_"Really?_ " he asks me, his voice barely audible.

_"Really_ ," I nod, grumbling.

" _Do you really-"_

_"Did YOU really have any doubts about it?!_ " I reply, vaguely bitter. _"Well... I'm sorry as well, maybe I'm not... I don't think I'm that good in making you realize that..."_

_"No way you have to be sorry, why on Earth?! It's so… so amazing..._ " he says bewildered, brightening up in an embarrassed smile he tries in vain to hide behind his hand. " _Oh Kami-sama, I... oh, Ryochan..._ "

He cups my face with his large, callous hands. He kisses me again, laughing. And then his face darkens at once. 

" _But this... this does not change the circumstances at all."_

_"No, it does not_ ," I confirm him. " _But I don't want you to think there's no solution at all, because it might not be like this._ "  
 

His eyes pierce deeply into me.

" _What are you thinking about, Ryochan?"_

_"I have... well, talked for long with my associates. We've been talking about it for a while already_ ," I begin. " _It wouldn't be easy nor quick nor painless, but we do reckon that it might be as well time to open a small branch of our shop in the Kansai area._

_In the last year, Shingo matured a lot, professionally speaking; he said he would not mind running the shop full time. He and Yoko would manage perfectly even without me, so that... well, I could handle the new Kansai shop on my own. The distribution itself would not suffer from this, quite the contrary, you know. I thought about Osaka, but maybe also Kobe could go, we'll see... I thought about moving here permanently, if you think that... well, if you think it might be some good idea for... well, for us."  
_

Ohkura blinks several times, but does not say a word.  
 

" _I don't reckon that letting you leave Tokyo is some good idea_ ," he finally says in a low, serious voice, articulating each word distinctly, and quite slowly.  
 

That's not what I wanna hear, though, and some dull rage is suddenly plugging my ears and making my eyes feel like burning hot. 

_"That's not an idea born out of the impulse of some silly moment, Ohkura,_ " I grunt, unable to hide how resented I'm feeling inside.  _"I've been thinking at it thoroughly, for quite long. I've been thinking at it for so damn long, actually, and Shingo and Yoko said they would not oppose such a project._

_It's quite clear we'd have to tighten the belt for a while, should we decide to go for it; but both the budget analysis and the financial ones seems not to raise any severe problem of economic viability._

_It's okay to do it. And right now, it's actually a nice moment to do this especially. It's likely we would have thought at it anyway, sooner or later._

_It's no... no unfounded idea, really."_

I take a deep breath, and I go on.

" _You know, my friend Jun runs a real estate agency in Tokyo; he's so good that he joked more than once with me, saying he could find me some nice place to stay in Osaka whenever I'd need it, should I have ever decided to move back to my hometown, one day._

_He knows how much I love Tokyo, of course, but he can be such a tease._

_He's got taste indeed, that guy, I know I can trust him._

_His eyes seriously gleamed when I suggested him to tell me more about his ideas for my future, some weeks ago._

_But I just, well, I've just mentioned him a few things so far; I want to make sure, first, about your opinion about it."_

Through his eyes, I can perceive Ohkura's stubbornness falter.

He's got it, that I am pretty determined about this thing.  
 

" _Listen, Ryochan, you're... you're in love with Tokyo. You DO LOVE TOKYO. Don't be this headstrong and don't say it's not like this. You cannot give it up. We both know how things are."_

_"True,_ " I admit, " _but some things came into my world, and right now there are more important matters to take into consideration, more important than my affection for a metropolis._

_If there's something I got to learn during these months, Ohkura, is that what counts the most for me is selling French wines, speaking about those products and those terroirs, no matter where I am located. It doesn't have necessarily to be in Tokyo."_

_"No, Ryochan, you cannot-"_

_"It doesn't have necessarily to be Tokyo,_ " I insists, rather nervous already. " _I'm not serving customers just in that city, you got to see it yourself. So please push Tokyo aside for a moment and just tell me what you do think about it. Generally speaking. Please."_

My eyes are still locked with his own ones. I have no intention of taking them off him. I have no intention of letting him have his way.

But should he not feel like starting this whole thing out with me, I'll have to go back to Tokyo with my tail between my legs. And forever, this time.  
 

" _How could I possibly not wish for something like this?_ " he murmurs softly, his voice broken.  _"How could I... I._.." he shakes his head more than once, quite distraught. 

_"You just have to tell me you want it, Ohkura. That you're willing to having me around for a little more while. But if you need some time to think about it carefully, I... I do understand. Really. We haven't been hanging out together for that long, after all."_

_"I needn't,_ " he quickly replies. " _I perfectly know what I want. And what I don't. And I don't want you to sacrifice something which is very precious for you, just for my own sake. What if we were to be over, some day?"_

I give him an horrified look, to the point I apparently make him burst into some laughter. But then, his face quickly darkens again.  
 

_"Hey,"_  I murmur.

_"Sorry, I... I fear I'm affecting you too much, Ryochan. And I don't like this."_

_"There's nothing irreversible in this world,"_  I try and make him think clearly, " _but this does not mean we cannot at least try this out. I love the challenges and the opportunities opening up in front of me, Ohkura. If I were not like this, I wouldn't have had sex on some shore by night with a guy I barely knew."_

He offers me a huge smug smile.

_"Would you really, honestly do something like this?"_  he's asking me again.

_"Sure I would_ ," I tell him, stubbornly.

_"Why?"_

_"Because I love you, you moron,_ " I confess straightforwardly, pretty proud with myself.

He smiles at me again, visibly embarrassed, and then we resume our stroll, walking beside one another.   
 

He's silent, for long.

And then, his fingers are slipping into mine, and his fingertips are caressing my skin.  
 

_"Okay_ ," he slowly whispers.  _"But it will be very, very demanding for you especially, so you have to promise me that, should something go wrong, you won't keep it all for yourself like you're trying to do every time, okay?"_

I think I wanna kiss him, touch him, have him naked and dragged on some bed right now. I stop dead instead, and do nothing.

There's a lump invading my throat. Does this means we're really taking some decision for our future, for the sake of both of us?  
 

I find myself in his strong arms without even knowing how come.

He's holding me tight, so tight.

I realize I'm sobbing.

I never cry. But he had already seen my tears.  
 

Ohkura is caressing my hair and kissing the top of my head, softly murmuring on my earlobe that everything's gonna be alright.

I was the one trying so desperately to reassure him, up until no more than two minutes ago, but the situation has completely reversed now. 

I have yet to realize how come, but I don't care about anything anymore.

I'm overwhelmed by the warmth of his firm body, and it's precisely where I wanna be.  
 

We get back home in the still of the night, hands in hands.

His body lays down on mine after contemplating for long every little bit of me, smiling sheepishly at the vague flush still marking my face, sometimes, when his brazen hands take possession of me.

I cannot hold onto his dark curls anymore, but his freshly shaved nape's making me excited like hell anyway.

I touch him, quite curious; he offers me a smug smile and starts purring openly.  
 

We make love like never before, so slowly and tenderly, and definitely aware, this time, of what we've just become.

A couple. A real couple, who wants to grow together, starting right from the bond there is between us, a thread suspended between two worlds.

He falls asleep in my arms, lulled by my caresses on his long, slender and gorgeous back.

I yawn. Despite the permanent state of tiredness caused by all the journeys back and forth, ever since I've started dating him it has gradually become less difficult, for me, to get asleep.  
 

It's as if he could encourage my whole being to get to relax, to knock off.

It's as if he could lead my whole body to realize everything's alright.

Love is making me feel good. Tremendously good.

Be with him. That's what I want.  
 

*  
 

EPILOGUE  
 

A few months later, the shop is nearly ready in Osaka.

It actually opened a few days ago, but some products from Alsace and Champagne haven't been delivered there, yet.

Yoko and Shingo came here yesterday; they both seem intimately satisfied.

None of them has ever been lavish with compliments for the results of our efforts at work, but I catch a glimpse of affection in the gaze they cast at the layout of the shop and the way I prepared the shop windows, and that's how I know they care about this project at least as much as I do.  
 

Above all things, it seems like they do seriously approve of my choice about Ohkura especially, and not just because they have a crush of him when singing at karaoke: we all had dinner together yesterday evening, in the small house Ohkura and me moved in together, a few kilometers from the sake brewery.

His mother couldn't be happier for us, his father's gradually giving in. He's a tough one, but it will be well worth it.  
 

Ohkura sold me his car, the one I use to arrive at the nearest platform and catch the train bound for Osaka, every morning; he's the happiest, because he's now able to ride his motorbike on daily basis, to go to work.

Sometimes he wants me to mount on his baby right behind him; he takes me to the station, requests a kiss as toll pay, and then he goes back to the sake brewery.  
 

The shop is really beautiful, if I may say, but handling it all is not that easy for now. I know it'll take me quite some time to gain customers and their trust in what I can offer, in terms of experience and professionalism, but I do honestly believe it will be a very entertaining challenge for me.  
 

I admit that sometimes I do miss the capital city way too much, with its endless swarm of sounds and lights, and the colorful traffic of people that nowhere else in the world is as you can find it in Shibuya.

Osaka is some very good compromise, though: its peculiar atmosphere is slowly coming it all back to me, once again. 

Osaka is making me appropriate of my origins, and this city is my new capital city, now that the place where I wanna go back to, is some little town at the feet of the mountain of the sparkling pure water.  
 

In order to celebrate my new beginning down here, I booked a room in a wonderful onsen nearby.

Before we go straight to the open bath, I let my mouth focus solely and patiently on every centimeter of Ohkura's soft skin, after I've had him rid of his yukata. It's some draining effort, a sacrifice paid off by several moans of his, an incredible variety of incredibily beautiful moans.

His thighs tighten around me when I kneel between his legs; out of the blue, I tell him I love him.  
 

_"Fuck me_ ," he whispers to me crying softly, then, as he brushes the damp, sticky bangs away from my forehead.

I look up at him, realizing at which moment of our story he's precisely thinking back at.

_‘Fuck me_ ’, I had asked him back then.

And then, there was no bed at all but some shore, in the black of night, in Bordeaux. And then... everything changed.  
 

So I go back on my feet, I pull him to me to hold him tight and Ohkura embraces me back, and for a while we're unmindful of sex, and of the whole world outside.

When, later on, he's soaking in the outer bath, I open a bottle of red 1985 Bordeaux wine I brought here expecially, and hand him a glass.  
 

_"Whoah... what's this_?" he asks me, sniffing quite curious at it.

_"Just try and tell me yourself_ ," I test him, chuckling.  _"You've learned a few things already."_

He closes his lids and smells the bouquet once again, concentrated.  
 

_"It's elegant, and pretty strong. But it's no pinot noir and no Burdundy,_ " he tries.

_"It's not, actually_ ," I do confirm him.

_"It's... intense. Very much. I'd say it could be some... Bordeaux wine?"_

I smile at him.

" _Excellent pupil, I'm having in here_ ," I murmur, making him open into some light yet intriguing smile _. "Bordeaux 1985 exactly."_

_"Oh."_

_"The year you were born is special, and not just around the Bordeaux area. Everywhere in France, it's been some exceptional vintage for wines._

_And even outside that world... well, I'm even more persuaded, now,_ " I actually confess him with a serious wink, and he flushes a delicious shade of pink.  
 

_"What about you, Ryochan?"_

_"The year I was born? Nah, it's been a disastrous vintage for French wines_ ," I tell him, slightly disappointed.

" _Maybe in France_ ," he retorts.  _"But you've been the best outcome of that year, the best thing ever, Ryochan. I'm also very sure about that."_

I cannot speak. I look away for a fleeting moment, pretty embarrassed, then I put down my glass and enter the hot water beside him.  
 

Ohkura is still busy tasting the wine; he listens carefully to it, he meditates on it, just as I taught him to.

He's so terribly sexy, this naked in the thermal water, carrying a glass of my favourite dark nectar in his hands.  
 

_"So, how's that?"_ I ask him again.  _"You've yet to tell me."_

He replies through a kiss.  
 

It's warmth, roundness.

It tastes like elegance, perfection, of things conquered through true obstinacy and hard work.  
 

We kiss again and again, our eyes closed, savouring the delicious flavour of the lips, brushing each other's skin teasingly, consciously, deliberately slowly. 

We make love again that night, until morning comes.

After all, there's no train we ought not to miss, at dawn, anymore.

 

*owari*

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1\. 1985 vintage or millésime: what I mentioned above about its 'fame' and top quality wines in France, it's real ;)
> 
> And that's the ending. I seriously loved writing this, so thanks a lot for supporting me throughout this story ♥


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